What I Ate (and wore) Wednesday

I haven’t participated in WIAW in awhile! This week’s post is not all about the food, because let’s be real, I forgot to take a lot of food pics recently, but I also wanted to share some of my outfits as well.

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I usually make protein banana softserve for breakfast, but who doesn’t like to switch things up sometimes? Now that I have more time in the mornings, I made some almond flour-based pancakes the other morning. They were cookie-dough inspired, filled with stevia chocolate chips, and topped with warmed frozen cherries and a side of about a teaspoon of maple syrup. I’ve been subconsciously avoiding most added sugars lately and it’s changed my tastebuds. Now even a little maple syrup is too sweet!
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I like to play the part of a broadcast journalist, even if I’m not one quite yet! I’ve been really into blazers lately and I kinda want one in every color…
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I finally ordered some more peanut flour and I’ve missed it a ton! I’m glad I took a break though because I know you can develop allergic reactions to things you eat too ofen…and I definitely used to OD on peanut flour. It was good to have it back in my life, though, in this shirataki noodle stir fry topped with spinach, pineapple, homemade roasted chickpeas and the most addicting spicy raw sunflower seeds from the bulk section at Whole Foods.
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As much as I love some booty-hugging yoga shorts (especially these from VS Pink), I don’t wear them unless I’m working out. I actually was able to wear this outfit outside on Sunday to play tennis with my dad! It was a glorious 60 degrees, sunny and my definition of a perfect winter day 😉 And getting in almost an hour of tennis with my dad was even better.

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I posted about these on Instagram the other day, but you didn’t get to see the actual boots! I was in need of some black riding boots, and these sale-priced ones from ALDO fit the bill perfectly. Plus they were 50% off, what’s not to love? I’ve been doing some really smart shopping lately and I love that I’ve learned to be budget conscious, at least with clothes…
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Banana softserve is still consumed at least once per day. FYI, frozen bananas taste incredible blended with PlantFusion cookies ‘n cream protein powder, dark cocoa powder, spinach (gotta get those greens in!) and topped with PB+coconut oil and stevia chocolate chips. It’s like a decadent dessert, but healthy enough for breakfast!
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Sometimes, you gotta throw on the leggings and the chambray shirt. I like my girly clothes, so even my casual wear is cutened up a bit. I’m obsessed with this shirt…and the scarf! Love those infinity scarves.
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And then of course, the girly side of me wins out most of the time. I wore this outfit (from Christmas) out to see Frozen with my mom (a really good movie) and then some outlet shopping. I think I could probably live in tights/dresses+skirts!

As an aside, I weighed myself the other day. NEVER a good idea, and it certainly wasn’t this time. I just knew I had gained some weight, but I wasn’t expecting to be so close to 100 pounds. That number scares me so much, because I’ve never been in the triple digit club. I know something is off with my body, though–no period in almost 9 months, not-so-great skin and some digestive issues have been plaguing me for awhile and I’m anxious for my doctor’s appointment next month to (hopefully) clear things up. Honestly, though, if I hadn’t weighed myself, I wouldn’t have guessed I weighed that much. I still look about the same, I fit in all my clothes, so I’m hoping some of the weight is muscle (I think some of it is, because I can feel the hardness of my abs, arms and legs) and hopefully, if my body is out of whack, I can get back to the right weight for me. Right now, I’m just trying hard not to let this derail my progress…

What have you been eating/wearing this week?

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19 thoughts on “What I Ate (and wore) Wednesday

  1. P says:

    I am hesitant about getting a chambray shirt since I’m not so sure about denim on top and bottom, but I think it looks great with the leggings and scarf!

    Very brave of you to get on the scale after a long while, especially since it can be triggering!

    • You should try a chambray shirt with leggings or non denim pants! I don’t like the denim-on-denim look either but I love my shirt with colored jeggings.

  2. Love all your outfits girl! Especially that floral skirt! So cute.

    You should NOT feel bad about being close to 100 pounds! Being in the triple digits for a person your age and height is HEALTHY! Not being there is where you start to have issues (like what you’re having with not having your period!). I’m sure if you go to your dr they’ll tell you the same thing! I know it can feel uncomfortable knowing you need to gain weight when you’re comfortable where you are….but seriously, you’ll be amazed at how clear your head is and how amazing you’ll feel when you’re at your optimal weight! 🙂 You can do it Ash!

    • Thanks Kaila for all your support! I’m hoping when I go to my doctor she’ll be able to clear some things up for me so I can be my healthiest!

  3. You look so professional in your blazer outfit! And I love all your other outfits. I think I desperately need a small shopping spree. And I’m with you on banana soft serve. Best thing ever.

    It sounds like we’re in similar places regarding our weight. I was so upset about breaking the 100 mark when I did, and I fought so hard to get back to just under. 99 would have been okay. But now I’m 120! And I had my freak out about it, and now I”m done. Remember that the number on the scale means close to nothing. It really is a stupid way to measure health. I hope that your doctors appointment can help shed some light on what’s going on, where you need to be, and how to get there.

    • Thanks! I’m glad you posted about that, because it reminded me that I’m not alone in the numbers struggle. It really is so pointless to define ourselves by the number, so I’m excited (kinda) for my appointment to figure out what’s up and how I can be healthy.

  4. All of your outfits are SO cute! I love the floral skirt and the boots from Aldo- what an amazing deal!

    You want to know what’s funny? As I was reading your post and looking at your pictures, I kept thinking “wow, she looks so gorgeous!” and “she looks healthier and happier than I’ve ever seen her”…then I got to the end and read about your weight struggle. It just goes to show that a number doesn’t (and shouldn’t) ever define your health and happiness. You’re maturing into a woman which naturally brings weight gain- and that’s a beautiful thing! Embrace gaining some curves and let yourself feel confident. You’re stunning, Ashley and you deserve freedom from those negative, controlling thoughts. (:

    • It’s so crazy how a little outside perspective can change things! I love that you pointed out that I look healthier and happier because that’s what I should focus on, NOT the number on the scale. I’ve been my happiest when I was living life and embracing my body, and I plan on getting back to that!

  5. I totally feel you on wanting a blazer in every color and I love the unique color of that one you have on! Also adoring the denim shirt + infinity scarf and high waisted floral skirt. LOVE florals!

    • Florals are my favorite! I wear them in all seasons because they just work so well and they remind me of warmer weather, so I like wearing them in winter for a little boost of summer happiness.

  6. If I ever come across a pink, sparkly blazer I will be mailing it to you (0;

    When I read “subconsciously avoiding” I completely get it, I mean, I think I know what you are talking about. It’s a funny thing, isn’t it?

    PS That last little bit kind of broke my heart — email me if ever you want to vent to someone who understands and can listen with a truly understanding heart, while at the same time not putting up with any Boosh. I could always use another friend to listen to my Boosh and say “I KNOW… BUT.” Just putting it out there.
    melissaannmiller@hotmail.com

    • I’m holding you to that promise about the blazer 😉 Haha but seriously, now I’ll be looking for a pink sparkly blazer!

      I will definitely be emailing you soon–I need a friend like that in my life or things just get too overwhelming that I have to share it on the blog!

  7. sara says:

    So to gain muscle, among other factors, you need to be lifting HEAVY/intensely and eating a surplus of calories.
    May I ask what you’ve been doing that makes you think that the weight you’ve been gaining is due to increased muscle mass?
    This is a genuine question, I’m not being rude at all,( I hope it doesn’t look that way), I’m honestly curious.

    I totally agree that banana soft serve is like the best thing ever( grr my blender is currently broken), and I absolutely love that shirt/legging outfit- you look fab.
    Xxx

    • Well, honestly I haven’t been lifting heavy per se but since this time last year, when I wasn’t lifting at all and mostly doing cardio, I’ve been lifting regularly a few times per week for about an hour each time. Not sure about the surplus of calories, as I haven’t been actively eating more, just eating intuitively rather than tracking everything and eating more than I have in years since my eating disorder. I’m hoping some of the weight I’ve gained is muscle (because I’ve noticed my arms and abs in particular getting firmer) but honestly I don’t know why I’ve gained weight other than something going wrong in my body causing other problems, because I workout every day for 45-60 minutes, eat clean/vegan/gluten free and when I have been tracking, I haven’t eaten over 1500 calories per day. So I’m as confused as you are as to my weight gain, which is why I’m seeing my doctor soon to clear things up!

      • sara says:

        Thanks for your truthful answer…it’s worrying though, as 1500 cals is incredibly for someone so young/active, to be gaining any weight whatsoever.
        I imagine this is a result of metabolic damage caused by your ED. This can be reversed and healed, if you’re willing to make changes to your lifestyle though.
        Xxx

  8. Hi!

    I’m new here. I found you thru Missy’s blog. Weighing yourself is always… tricky, for me at least, yet I feel compelled to do it once a week. I wanna know where things are. If the number pleases me, it gives me energy. If not, the effect is of course the opposite. Stupid, huh.

    I used to hang onto a-50kg limit. Then let go and have realized that those two extra kilos, say 4 pounds, make the difference. I just have so much more energy. I can actually live my life. Crazy, huh. So I’m learning to like that number now. Recovery is about finding a compromise between dreams and reality.

    • Thanks for stopping by–hope you come back again!

      Weighing is hard for me, too, but I think doing it once a week would be better for my mind, rather than 5 or more times per week. It’s hard to let go of those numbers we’ve put into our heads, but I’m really glad tha you’ve found that letting go puts you in a better mindset and gives you more energy! I’m so sick of wasting my time worrying about numbers, especially if they mean nothing!

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