Hi girlies! Hope you enjoyed your weekend! As I mentioned in my last post (which I loved all the comments on, BTW!) I went home this weekend, actually for the first time since spring break. And I’m headed back home this weekend, because of Easter. I know it seems like I go home for the weekend a lot but I only live about a 2 hour drive away, so it’s not a huge haul plus having no car means my weekends on campus are super-boring (yet really good for getting homework, papers and studying done). Usually I go home every other weekend, and it’s nice to get a little break from college life, and I love my family to death so it’s a win-win. Anyways, I wanted to recap my weekend for this week’s edition of WIAW. Instead of just sharing all my eats (most of which went undocumented, unfortunately), I also wanted to give you all a little insight into what I was thinking regarding food/fitness this weekend. As I’m sure you can guess, I still struggle a lot with disordered thoughts but I think letting them out is a good way to figure out where they’re coming from and how to refocus them.
Oh, and P.S. today (Tuesday) is my daddy’s birthday! I won’t get to be there to celebrate with him but I’ll just have to have a belated party for him this weekend!
Friday
After writing my hand off finishing an essay exam in my only Friday class, I waited around until my mom and sister got here to pick me up. Usually it’s just my mom, since she doesn’t work on Fridays, but it was their spring break this past week, so my sister was able to come up and get me too. We are really close, so I loved seeing her again.
We had plans to go out to lunch, which I was really excited for. My mom let me pick the place, and being indecisive as usual, I had come up with 3 or 4 possible places. We checked out two of them and finally decided on Ingredient, which is a small chain restaurants with locations in Colorado (where we went, obviously), Missouri, Kansas and Nebraska. I had looked up the menu ahead of time and I found plenty of things that were Ashley-friendly, aka vegan (or could be modified to be vegan) and ‘safe’, ED-wise. Yes, looking up menus/nutritional facts ahead of time is a habit I’ve clung to, I pretty much do it every time I’m planning on going out to eat, not just to find the lowest calorie item, but also now because I’m eating primarily vegan, and non-vegan things can be hiding in almost anything! I would like to move away from the calorie researching thing, but it’s still a scary thing for me not to know the calories in something.
Anyways, we settled on Ingredient and we enjoyed the sunshine and warm weather outside as we waited for our food. Like I said, the restaurant had a lot of options for me, but I ended up getting something ‘safe’, aka a build-your-own salad. But to be honest, I didn’t order it just because it was safe, but because I really love getting to make creative salads. I ordered napa/bok choy mix topped with fresh jalapenos, artichoke hearts, fresh strawberries, white beans and fat-free raspberry vinaigrette. Random, I know, but it was what was appealing to me at the moment. And I did love the salad, but I mostly just ate the toppings because the lettuce ended up being hearts of romaine, and it wasn’t very tasty. But…I kinda regretted getting it, because I saw that they had other yummy-sounding options, like a falafel sandwich, a veggie burger with whatever toppings you wanted and make-your-own pizza (which I could have gotten without cheese). But I chose the ‘safe’ option, and while it was good, it wasn’t very satisfying.
Saturday
I woke up bright and early (aka like 8 am) because my dad, sister and I had plans to play tennis! We’ve been playing tennis on and off during the spring and summer ever since my sister and I went to a tennis camp 5 years ago and discovered that we really liked it. Now it’s one of my favorite forms of exercise, because it’s challenging mentally and physically, and I can do it with other people, namely my dad and sister. We kinda play doubles, only my dad is on his own 
We had breakfast and set out for the tennis courts that are about a 10 minute drive from our house–which is HUGE, because almost nothing is within 10 minutes of our house. We live in the middle of nowhere 
My tennis 'outfit': navy hoodie (Hollister), white cami (Aeropostale), new royal blue yoga shorts (Hollister).
The weather was gorgeous, even at 10 in the morning. It was the perfect temperature (around 70 degrees) and the sun was out with almost no wind. We played for almost an hour, but I wasn’t even close to being tired. In fact, I felt like we had only been playing for half an hour! The only issue was, I tripped on my way back from class on Friday (klutz status!) and totally tore up both knees, plus a few layers of skin ripped off one of my big toes. TMI, I know! I was wearing band-aids all over, and of course, my right knee was kinda stiff because the skin was trying to grow back and all that jazz that happens after you fall down. It didn’t really impact my playing, just that I wasn’t able to run to get the ball as much as usual. This made my ED voice act up big time. He was basically just telling me that even though we’d been playing for an hour, it was barely a workout, because I didn’t run as much as I usually would and mostly just walked to get the ball when it went out of the court. Okay, the reason I play tennis is not only to burn calories, but also because I truly love it, but it still made me feel ‘bad’ and ‘fat’ that I hadn’t been able to exert myself as much as usual.
Saturday's lunch: frozen pineapple, mixed greens topped with mini sweet peppers (SO GOOD!), edamame and flax tempeh cubes.
Lunch was…lame. Like I do on most weekends at home, I take advantage of the abundant (or sometimes not-so-abundant) selection of produce and made myself a salad. I was going for an Asian-ish twist, so I whipped up some peanut dressing made with peanut flour and sriracha sauce, and topped the greens with a little edamame, a few mini sweet peppers (a new obsession) and cubed tempeh heated up on the stove. I also had some frozen pineapple on the side. Unfortunately, the dressing turned out to be bland and the edamame was freezer-burned so the entire salad was not too tasty. I ate all the pineapple, peppers and most of the tempeh but had to throw the rest out. Better luck next time? And yes, I know this was nowhere near enough food, especially since I had just played tennis, but I was just not feelin’ it. Of course, later on I was starving–duh, I had barely eaten before! I’m still trying to work out my weird hunger cues–I am rarely hungry after working out, but I definitely feel it later on.
After church with my family (a guy from Jews for Jesus came and told us all about the Seder meal for Passover–it was really cool!) we headed home for some dinner. I was very hungry even after having a decent snack a few hours earlier. My mom was going to grill sausages (chicken for my family, veggie for me) and have some salad and fries (aka sweet potato tots for me) on the side. I was excited…until I saw the sausages she bought for me. They were the Field Roast brand, the Mexican chipotle flavor. Um yeah, these sounded totally delicious…but 250 calories for one sausage? That’s about how many calories I’ve been eating for dinner, never mind we were also having stuff on the side! I freaked out, despite the fact that A) they sounded really good, B) they are pretty healthy and non-processed and C) they have 23 grams of protein per sausage (not too shabby!) But the disordered side of me went straight towards the ‘high’ calorie count (which is honestly not that high). I tried to compensate by skipping a bun (I’m not really a fan of them anyway) and only having a half serving of sweet potato tots. This didn’t stop me from mentally beating myself up after dinner, especially when my dad said, “Wow, you must have liked it!” because I ate the whole sausage. Well, yes, I did like it, but I interpreted his comment to mean “Wow, you’re a pig!” Unfortunately, I let his comment get to me and after dinner, I tried to feel better about how much I had eaten (not that much in reality, but more than I’m used to) by doing some cardio circuits for 15 or 20 minutes. I do this sometimes, try to make up for eating what I see as too many calories (aka the number doesn’t fit into my set plan for the day, despite the fact that it might still be not enough) by working out extra. And on top of this, it wasn’t enjoyable because my knee was still hurting and my ankles were sore. That’s been freaking me out–my ankles have ached whenever I’ve been doing cardio since this weekend and I’m not sure why–and I’m scared I’ll have to take a break from daily workouts, which is a big no-no for me.
Saturday's real outfit: new flutter-sleeved royal blue tee (Hollister), navy twill shorts with white belt (Hollister).
Sunday
Sunday was a LOT better for me, thoughts-wise. I had breakfast with my family (BTW, chocolate and peanut butter Puffins taste amazing in unsweetened almond milk, they sweeten it up and make it taste like cookies and cream!), got ready for the day and played a few tricks on my parents. It was April Fool’s Day, after all! They were a little lame, like prank calling them on their cell phones using blocked numbers (they somehow knew it was me and my sister) but the best one was pouring some vinegar and tonic water into my dad’s flavored sparkling water at lunch. He totally spit it out and it was just hilarious! I was considering putting some toothpaste in place of the cream in the Oreos we had in the pantry, but I didn’t want to be too mean
Sunday's lunch: spicy peanut pasta salad, green grapes, garlicky kale.
Speaking of lunch, it was a winner, especially compared to Saturday’s. I whipped up a quick pasta salad using quinoa pasta (love this stuff), chopped baby carrots, edamame and spicy peanut dressing (basically the same as on Saturday, but I got the proportions right this time so it actually tasted like something). I also had some green grapes on the side, as well as garlicky kale, which I sauteed on the stove with some salt and garlic until it was crispy. It was so good, I am definitely making this as much as I can! The best part of lunch, though, was enjoying it out on the deck with my family reading the Sunday paper. I love getting to eat outside and enjoy a leisurely lunch, which I never get to do at school. Only 4 and a half more weeks til I can eat outside every day!
Before my mom and I had to hit the road, my sister and I went for a quick walk on our street. The weather was perfect and it’s hard to believe it was almost 80 degrees when I was home–it’s been cold, cloudy and windy the past two days, plus it snowed…Colorado is bipolar! 
It’s supposed to warm up by tomorrow though.
Back in good old FoCo, my mom and I had dinner at Garbanzo, since they were having a buy one get one deal. It was really crowded and busy because of this, but still enjoyable. It’s one of my favorite fast casual places to eat at, since it’s all Mediterranean cuisine, which is one of my faves, and they also have a lot of veg options. I got my usual plate of hummus, cilantro sauce, fresh red cabbage, tabbouleh (they have the best!), lettuce and I tried the portobello mushroom this time. I would probably skip it next time, since it was really watery, but it wasn’t too bad. I ate it all minus most of the mushrooms and loved it. And surprisingly, I didn’t feel too guilty about it, which I usually do after eating out. However, Garbanzo is a really healthy place and I truly just love it.
Monday's quick lunch: fresh kale massaged with peanut flour sauce, Clif Kids s'mores bar, red grapes.
So yes, I realize this was a monstrous post, but it really feels good to get all my thoughts out there and just be honest with myself and all of you. I really love how Tessa does this with her WIAW posts, because I can always relate, and I think it just adds something rather than just sharing what I ate. I think it’s more important to share the thoughts and feelings behind the food, rather than the food itself.
What did you do this weekend? What’s your favorite way to eat kale?
Hopefully you enjoy this for the time being though!
